Video: Personally by Psquare

Beautifully choreographed and visually captivating, 'Personally' is a video release by the dynamic duo comprising twins Peter and Paul Okoye better known as Psquare. The video features dance diva 'Kaffy' as well as comedic genius 'Osita Iheme' AKA Pawpaw, with an over-the-top tribute to the late King of Pop, Michael Jackson. It is an enjoyable piece of work, which only shows these guys are not keen on slowing down at any moment. Watch below:

The Pain Diaries

Pain can do either one of two things: It could break us down or build us up, there are however instances when it does both sequentially. By breaking us down, we could gain some perspective on how to lift ourselves up.
Heart-break, disappointment, broken relationships, underachieved goals, are all examples of situations that evoke some amount of pain. A lot of people try to make believers of themselves by continuously affirming statements like, 'I do not care what people think of me', 'I am a tough person', 'I don't let things get to me easily', 'I can do it myself', etc. These are just few of many phrases we usually say to make ourselves feel better, when in reality, we might be hurting.

On a sunny Saturday afternoon some ten years ago, I had just done my morning chores - now getting ready to meet some friends of mine, my Motorola-branded cell rang - it was Anita. Anita and I had been dating for about a month or so, she was a goddess at least in my own eyes. Light of skin, dark brown eyes, and lips that made pink flowers the world over ashamed of themselves. what she lacked in physical appearance, she made up for in character - very kind and sweet she was. I flaunted her whenever I could and as a teen, I was quite proud of myself - I had an angel for a girlfriend.
Maybe I made her feel too special or maybe I got boring, maybe she thought herself too beautiful to be in a committed relationship - I still don't know - that call though, I still know all about it, it definitely did the damage it was meant for. Anita had broken up with me and girl did not seem tense about it at all, in fact, it was more like a casual greeting exchanged between neighbours during the wee hours of the morning - so straight forward it was, no plea, no reason, and definitely no hormone-induced exchange. I was young and that was hurtful. I have since recovered.

'Terror' was the name given to a cross-bred German-shepherd puppy of ours. He grew quite big for his age, at six months he could stand on his hind legs and be face to face with me standing at five foot-ten - very bubbly and quite fun to be around, he ate almost every other left-over we had to offer - the canine had no restraint whatsoever when it came to food, this just made him all the more delightful to have around. I had just returned home during a mid-semester break, tired and hungry I made for my bed. Maybe because it was assumed I already knew, no one told me Terror had died - it wasn't until the next morning I realized the compound was unusually quiet. "Well of course," I thought to myself, there was no sound of growling or barking. "Where is that fat dog," I asked. "Oh I thought you knew, he died two weeks ago." It was anger I felt, probably because I blamed the dog keeper for not paying close attention to Terror's health.

Writing my university entrance exam a second time was as tense as it could possibly be, I failed it the first time so it had to be better this time around. On completing the papers within the designated time, I remember being really excited at the outcome - it went smoothly and I wrote cleverly, in fact, it seemed quite easy to me. So you can imagine my shock when two weeks later at a cyber cafe, I saw a score of 193 as against the minimum requirement of 200. I had fell short a second time and I was heart-broken - so much that I told myself I would never attend a university, it was that bad. I was so disappointed and lost focus, the pain was too much. Of course I lived through it, got into the university and studied the course I always wanted to.

First time i saw my mom cry, I don't even think I have seen her shed a tear since then - the woman's a robot. I was a kid actually, an uncle of hers' came visiting just like every other day he did; only this time, he brought devastating news of the passing of a family friend of hers'. It was not a good sight, but I understood pain and its psychological effect on us. It made my otherwise strong and fierce mom break-down.
No one is immune to it, it strikes us and we feel the weight of it. It comes in many forms and my illustrations above are mere representations on emotional responses in different situations. Pain never killed anyone, and I don't suppose it ever will so there's really no point letting others dictate our emotional state.
Learning to embrace circumstances is a proven method to overcoming the negative effect such may pose to incite in us. By accepting what we have little or no control over, we activate a fail-safe in us that instinctively provides a solution dependent upon how each individual is built.

Analogues Of Infection: The Nut And The Campanile

Infectious behaviors and attitudes abound all around us - sometimes they make a lasting impact on us, and sometimes they just infect us temporarily - nevertheless, it is a wise thing to avoid people who are bitter, unhappy, vindictive and sour. Emotional states are as infectious as diseases, they can sap and draw out many a good emotion and replace them with unhealthy feelings of resentment. I have heard someone say 'A man can die from the misery of another' - I do not know how true that may be but i can say for certain that the misery of one may often time rub off on another.

Many things are said to be infectious. Sleeping can be infectious, and yawning as well. In large-scale strategy, when the enemy is agitated and shows an inclination to rush, do not mind in the least. Make a show of complete calmness, and the enemy will be taken by this and will become relaxed. You infect their spirit. You can infect them with a carefree drunk-like spirit, with boredom or even weakness. (A BOOK OF FIVE RINGS, MIYAMOTO MUSASHI, SEVENTEENTH CENTURY)

There are so many around us who have been brought down by circumstances beyond their control, they deserve all the help and sympathy we can give them. But make no mistake, there are those who are not born to misfortune or unhappiness, but have drawn it upon themselves by their destructive actions and unsettling effect on others - it would be a great thing if we could help them, change their patterns or possibly even raise them up - but this may just be our undoing, we might just get caught up in the whirlwind of negativity circling above them. The reason for this is, humans are very susceptible to the moods, emotions, and thinking patterns of those with whom we spend our time.
Chronic dissatisfaction is one of the most insidious infections we come across. It is the building block by which all other negative emotions draw fuel. Bitterness, unhappiness, excessive thinking, sourness and vindictiveness are all signs of dissatisfaction. On the other hand, contentment is the one and only vaccination against dissatisfaction - contentment with ourselves, our community and generally our lives can go a long way to reducing, even eliminating, the infectious nature of discontent.
There will always be those who suffer from unhappiness and such, I do not say to run the other way whenever we meet them - we must however be careful when trying to better their situation - the first step being understanding the reason for their unhappiness, then working your way up from there. There is no need trying to change one whose heart and soul is discontent. Being able to recognize people on the effect they have on those around them is a sure way to know who is happy and who is not. Associating with those who draw happiness to themselves by their good cheer, natural buoyancy, and intelligence is not just a preference - it is a necessity.
If by nature you are miserly, or possibly just bitter through no fault of yours, it is necessary to associate with generous and lively souls. Doing this will draw their emotions to you, it opens up everything that is tight and restricted in you.
A gloomy individual must gravitate towards the cheerful.
An isolated individual must befriend the gregarious.
Never associate with those who share your defects - that just reinforces everything that holds you back from getting far in life. It is certain that we always come across those who do not appreciate our work, those who will not just understand our perspective - these people will try to bring you down by bad-mouthing you, some by indirectly poking hurtful jabs at you - after knowing all this, never give in to subtle or harsh critical opinions when you know your worth and yourself.

A famous Italian Renaissance polymath wrote this story:
THE NUT AND THE CAMPANILE
A nut found itself carried by a crow to the top of a tall campanile, and by falling into a crevice succeeded in escaping its dread fate. It then besought the wall to shelter it, by appealing to it by the grace of God, and praising its height, and the beauty and noble tone of its bells. "Alas," it went on, "as I have not been able to drop beneath the green branches of my old father and to lie in the fallow earth covered by his fallen leaves, do you, at least, not abandon me. When I found myself in the beak of the cruel crow, I made a vow that if I escaped, I would end my life in a little hole."
At these words, the wall, moved with compassion, was content to shelter the nut in the spot where it had fallen. Within a short time, the nut burst open: Its roots reached in between the crevices of the stones and began to push them apart; its shoots pressed up towards the sky. They soon rose above the building, and as the twisted roots grew thicker they began to thrust the walls apart and force the ancient stones from their old places. Then the wall, too late and in vain, bewailed the cause of its destruction, and in short time it fell to ruin. (LEONARDO DA VINCI, 1452-1519)

Such is the power of infection.

Society, Belief And Equality (Part 3): The Niche

Influence is a very powerful thing. It is that which we are accustomed to seeing, that forms the basic rudiment of our personalities. Personality is therefore a function of the immediate environment; whether we be sanguine, choleric, phlegmatic or melancholic, the smallest building block that shapes and remoulds our outlook on society stays primarily dependent on influence; influence itself being dependent on whatever societal niche we fall into.
We are all part of at least one niche: At work, at home, on the internet, at school, on the playground, at the cinema, at the market place.....the list goes on and on, and our ability to recognize the characteristic behaviour among members of a particular niche keeps us from animosity.

I believe it is highly unlikely to change or alter the way a person thinks. People will behave in a way they are most comfortable in, so pushing them out of their comfort zone is really far-fetched.
Because our social and cultural niches have so much in recent times become so intertwined; people who share the same culture will also share the same social values most of the time, and those who do not, probably grew up living under a culture different from one they would fit into naturally. But even in this situation, such people will still seek out those who share in their ancestry.
Evolution has made us inextricably social and cultural. We are, each of us, born into a particular society with its specific structure and a particular culture with its specific languages and beliefs. For humans, then, society and culture constitute niches at least as much as the ecological environment.

The social niche of a population is the sum of all the social selection pressures to which the population is exposed and the cultural niche of a population is the sum of all the cultural selection pressures to which the population is exposed (Odling-Smee et al.). These are two very different ideals. We focus on the interaction of society (role-structures) and culture (ideas) and the potential for their distinct dynamics to reshape our outlook on the world.

STEREOTYPING: This is one very common sign that tells the ideals of a societal niche, it is man-made; we usually employ this in an attempt to distinguish ourselves from those we feel we do not share a cultural and/or social niche with.
INTIMACY: Sexually and psychologically, our likeness and fondness for people will usually be based on how much we share an attribute with them; socially and/or culturally.
CHARACTER: People will most likely behave in the same way if they share an ideal about life. Although character can be influenced at different stages in ones' life, the basic trait of an individual is never totally lost during their transitional developmental stages.
OPINION: Opinion is not really a guaranteed factor in identifying niches since it is not a belief system. It however is subject to our sub-conscious, meaning it still is an inverse function of dependence on the niche we belong to.

The totality of human existence is by far dependent on society and its various niches, the greatest of which is the world-niche. Every other sub-category is humanely induced - sometimes unknowingly, and sometimes deliberately. Whatever the case, there is no belief system that trumps another in its entirety. Somehow it stays interwoven, thus keeping us mold into one massive ball of complexities.

Society, Belief And Equality (2): Ostentation

Have you ever achieved a set goal and felt the need to let everyone else know about it, about how you worked so hard at it? Yes, I'm sure you have at least at one time or the other. Humans always want to talk non-stop about their good deeds, it is almost impossible to keep a tight lid on ones' own accomplishments; why? because it feels good to hear ourselves talk about them.
However, people naturally do not want to see or listen to others brag about what they did and did-not, it usually comes off as blowing trumpets. Sounding the alarm when a good thing or deed is done not only feels good to the bearer, it also incites disgust from most hearers. This is really no fault of theirs (hearers) because they themselves might have worked hard, sometimes even harder than the bearer; so hearing others rant on and on about how good they did stirs up some form of resentment. It is never prudent to prattle on about yourself or call too much attention to your actions. The more we talk about our deeds, the more suspicion we invoke and God help us if the wrong person with some built-up resentment decides to put the braggadocio in us to rest.
We also make the mistake of thinking that we are safe to speak of our achievements amongst our close friends and family, this is also a mistake. At a time during our developmental stage in life, the first people we measure our success by are usually those closest to us; they are the ones we see almost on a daily basis. Even among siblings, there exists a little and subtle form of competition.
The only person that we could completely trust to listen to our own achievement and deed is ourselves. This will not only keep us happy, it will also give us a sense of fulfillment. Talking less about yourself and more about the other person is always a preference in dealing with people. If you are to let your deeds become a topic of discussion, it should be at the behest of another; even at that, it must remain modest.

I was at a gathering yesterday morning, a gathering of at least three hundred men and women. An introduction was made ushering in a speaker, he was very well dressed - nicely cut tailor-made suit, he also had a confident (kind of swagger) carriage. Dead silence fell on the room as I'm sure everyone was eager to hear his lecture, same as I. After about five or six minutes of getting the crowd relaxed and loosened up by telling half-good jokes, Mr. speaker man spent the next thirty minutes talking about all that he owned, things he had acquired within the past two years speaking on the topic he was about to share with us.
It was a good lecture in the end, but the emotions he had stirred up at the beginning of his lecture made almost every other person in the room complacent when it came time to contributing financially in highlighting his invitation; kind of as a form of appreciation somewhat. By speaking too much of himself, unknowingly to him, he had caused people to think he was being manipulative. He might have waited till the end of the lecture, at least by what time we would have drawn up our own conclusions on his ability to communicate effectively.
Avoiding ostentation wherever we are is really not that difficult, plus it does more good than harm.

Society, Belief And Equality (1)

Altering ones' style and language to suit different people at different times is by far a great developmental asset. The pseudo-belief in equality - the idea that talking and acting the same way with everyone, no matter their rank, makes us somehow a paragon of civilization - is a terrible mistake. That said, it is not an entirely bad thing to have a distinct aura about one's self, but if a person decides to be blunt and straight forward all the time; those below them might take it as a form of condescension, while those above them will be offended, though they may not admit it.
It is a necessity thus, to be master in the art of subtlety when relating with others in our society. Subtlety stands in for the sake of individuals who are not able to completely alter their persona at will. But for those willing, changing your style and way of speaking to suit each individual differently, is always worth the effort.
Never should we assume that our criteria for behaviour and judgement are universal. Adapting to different cultures and traditions is the highest form of civility one can possess, it also puts us at an advantage.

It is a wise thing to be polite; consequently, it is a stupid thing to be rude. To make enemies by unnecessary and willful incivility, is just as insane a proceeding as to set your house on fire. For politeness is like a counter - an avowedly false coin, with which it is foolish to be stingy. A sensible man will be generous in the use of it...Wax, a substance naturally hard and brittle, can be made soft by the application of a little warmth, so that it will take any shape you please. In the same way, by being polite and friendly, you can make people pliable and obliging, even though they are apt to be crabbed and malevolent. Hence politeness is to human nature what warmth is to wax. (ARTHUR SCHOPENHAUER, 1788-1860)

Now, there are those with whom civility have no effect. Not everyone is adept at being open to politeness; for as little warmth softens wax, it has no effect on metal. To soften metal, one must apply intense heat which in itself can be dangerous without bodily protection. It is now also necessary that we know whom is wax and whom is metal.

Society And Character

While a poor woman stood in the market place selling cheese, a cat came along and carried of a cheese. A dog saw the pilferer and tried to take the cheese away from him, but the cat stood up to the dog. They pitched into each other. Whilst the dog barked and snapped, the cat spat and scratched; but they could bring the battle to no decision.
"Let us go to the fox and have him referee the matter," the cat finally suggested. "Agreed," said the dog. So they went to the fox. The fox listened to their arguments with a judicious air. "Foolish animals," he chided them, "why carry on like that? If both of you are willing, I'll divide the cheese in two and you'll both be satisfied."
"Agreed," said the cat and the dog. So the fox took out his knife and cut the cheese in two, but, instead of cutting it lengthwise, he cut it in the width. "My half is smaller!" the dog protested. The fox looked judiciously through his spectacles at the dog's share. "You are right, quite right!" the fox decided. So he went and bit off a piece of the cat's share. "That should make it even," he said.
When the cat saw what the fox did she began to yowl: "Just look! My part is smaller now!" The fox again put on his spectacles and looked judiciously at the cat's share. "Right you are," said the fox. "Just a moment, and i will make it right." And he went and bit off a piece from the dog's cheese. This went on so long with the fox nibbling first at the dog's and then at the cat's share, then he finally ate up the whole cheese before their eyes. (A TREASURE OF JEWISH FOLKLORE, NATHAN AUSUBEL, ED., 1948)

There is a quote that goes like, "People always want what they cannot have." Well for the purpose of this post, I'm rephrasing it to be, "People will always want what they do not yet have."

There are a lot of interpretations and explanations regarding the word 'Envy', it would be time-consuming to get into each and every one of them. But the point being made in its entirety is virtually the same. It is a perfectly normal human emotion; though it is an emotion one might never hear another admit to very often. It is a strong emotion nonetheless; one that has divided kingdoms, started wars, and even torn relationships apart. Yes, envy has been and will always be, and i do not aim to banish it by writing this expose'. For those with an open mind willing to see the danger for what it is, pay close attention: ENVY IS THE WORST KIND OF EMOTION A PERSON CAN HAVE!
It is the mother of all negative emotions we as humans have come to see as normal. Hate, jealousy, anger, malice, corruption, aggression, and so on... all stem from a trunk of envy. It is the selfish need to be better than the next person that incites a lot of most if not all of the negative emotions we feel for others. Have i ever felt envious of another? Of course i have, else i would not be writing this.
Will the world automatically become a better place if we all choose to avoid emotions like these? No, I do not think so, but, it is a step in the right direction.

Passing Thoughts

Earlier today i came across an online forum where some moral issues and perceived standards were being discussed, so I just had to chip in my thoughts and of course, it rumpled a few feathers; I guess maybe my point of view is a little bit too rational for some. What I believe though is there are always rational explanations to everything that happens, irrationality on the other hand is the much more easy-to-grasp option we choose to understand something we could not understand otherwise. It is really easy to sit in judgement on other people when we ourselves are not completely free from errors.

Most of us try to do the right things in life if only so because we want to look ourselves in the mirror the next day and like who we see. Nobody wants to live with guilt, regrets and/or remorse and with good reason, things like that can be disastrous. I have noticed though that there are certain people out there who feel morally superior to others in their ability to tell right from wrong; these are the ones I refer to as irrational. People like this will usually make an argument based on their religious or moral predisposition rather than on what is probable.
We see ourselves as much more ethical, thereby relegating every other person that does not fit into our ethical and moral criteria. Usually, this behavior stems from a misconceived notion and an inflated unrealistic self-aggrandizing view of ourselves: Criticizing the inaction of others is by far the easiest route to making ones' self feel better. When we say we would never do this or that in a certain situation, are we really being true to ourselves? Okay so maybe we are, but does that make us better decision makers because we never fell short in our lives? Does it entail we were master of our own life-course? At what point does reason get mixed up with cynicism? The fact is, no one really knows how they would react in any given situation unless confronted with that situation.
Statements like, I would never cheat on a test, or cheat on my spouse; never break the law, never behave like that morally bankrupt guy; are all ethically accepted views. But does anyone ever start out wanting to be morally bankrupt? Does the teenage girl next door want to be a mom at 16? I don't think so. Then why do people with a mistaken and inflated moral view of themselves try to weigh the in-actions of others based on their own moral inclination; holding everyone else up to their high moral standards.
Passing judgement on people only serves to make us appear more superior in our own eyes. It leaves me thinking that when an irrational person experiences a situation where their actions falls short of the expectations of others, it might certainly teach them something, perhaps humble them to the point where their expectations become a little bit more rational. He/She might just realize that most behaviors are usually in direct proportion with the situation causing it(cause and effect) and not the moral inclination of the person involved. I do not intend making excuses for immorality, I am only being rational.
We have resorted to setting up double standards for ourselves just to give us enough leeway, so we can look in the mirror and tell ourselves that we are not breaking any rules. We create loop-holes for ourselves and in so doing become hypocrites.
I think we all are a little bit guilty of having the holier-than-thou sentiment built into us. After all, it is not so bad to think good of yourself and to have standards of behavior that are a ideal. The trouble comes when we try to impose our ideals, ethics and moral beliefs on others, and then criticize them when they fail to meet it.

Society And Isolation

So I guess we all have been in a situation where all we wanted was to be left alone, I know I have. This behaviour is not an entirely awkward one; but when being alone becomes the identity associated with an individual, the effects are threatening.
Why it could be threatening, you may ask. The simple explanation is; our social lives, our behaviour, our attitude, and our personal relationships become affected, they deteriorate so much that the only way out of the brewing catastrophe is to do the exact opposite of what being left alone originally entails. Becoming sociable and accessible is just about as good as medicine is to health in countering the effects of isolation.
The world is dangerous and there are enemies everywhere-everyone has to protect themselves. Building a fortress or wall will almost always seem the best and safest alternative. But isolation exposes us to more danger than it protects us from; it cuts the individual from valuable information-information that may not be so important to this individual, but still it is information nonetheless. Isolation also makes a person conspicuous and an easy target. Humans, being habitual in nature will find a way to make the stand-alone guy regret ever being a loner. People love to see that others are interested in them, this is one sentiment a loner does not care to stroke. Keeping ones' self in a one-man army comes off to others as a sign of arrogance and aloofness, this may just be the number one reason why a loner is usually mistaken for an arrogant/proud person.
It is good to circulate among people, find allies, and mingle. “No man is an island”, they say. An individual is usually shielded from predator jabs and disgruntled attacks from others when they blend into the crowd.
The center of attention and completely obvious John will almost always, and with certainty, be the focal point of criticism when the time comes for it.

THE EMPEROR RULER OF CHINA
Ch’in Shih Huang Ti, the first emperor of China (221-210 B.C), was the mightiest man of his day. His empire was vaster and more powerful than that of Alexander the Great. He had conquered all the kingdoms surrounding his own kingdom of Ch’in and unified them into one massive realm called China, forging a single nation and culture out of many. He also consolidated the many walls on the borders and built them into the Great Wall of China. Now after so many accomplishments, and during the last years of his life; few, if anyone, saw him.
The emperor lived in the most magnificent palace built to that date, in the capital city of Hsien-yang. The palace had 270 pavilions; all of these were connected by secret underground passageways, allowing the emperor to move through the palace without anyone seeing him. He slept in a different room every night, and anyone who inadvertently laid eyes on him was instantly beheaded. Only a handful of men knew his whereabouts, and if they revealed it to anyone, they too, were put to death.
The first emperor had grown so terrified of human contact that when he had to leave the palace he traveled incognito, disguising himself carefully. On one such trip through the provinces, he ‘suddenly’ died. His body was borne back to the capital in the emperor’s carriage, with a cart packed with salted fish trailing behind to cover up the smell of the rotting corpse-no one was to know of his death. He died alone, far from his family, his wives, his friends, and his courtiers, accompanied only by a minister and a handful of eunuchs.
Emperor Ch’in was a renowned warrior, fearless and of unbridled ambition. He made many enemies because of his policies, most of which he enacted during the process of unification. As a result of this, he grew constantly afraid, even paranoid, thus he withdrew deeper and deeper into the palace to protect himself. As a side effect of the decision he made to remain hidden, he slowly lost control of the realm and happenings around him. Eunuchs and ministers formulated political policies and enacted them without his approval, some even without his knowledge; they also plotted against him. By the end, he was emperor in name only because he was so isolated; he also lost the respect and reverence he once commanded in his court.

This is one of many repercussions in isolation: Retreat into a fortress and you lose your ear for what is happening around you, as well as a sense of proportion. I myself have been in a situation like this, I know from experience that keeping to ones’ self and being isolated creates more problems than it solves. Apart from cutting yourself off from all kinds of information around you, one can become a victim of depression, even suicidal thoughts may emerge if not managed carefully. Suffice it to say, Emperor Ch’in Shih Huang Ti was poisoned by the very same people he let into the wall he formed around himself.

(Solitude is dangerous to reason, without being favourable to virtue... Remember that the solitary mortal is certainly luxurious, probably superstitious, and possibly mad, Dr. SAMUEL JOHNSON, 1709-1784).

Because humans are social creatures by nature, anyone who seeks to be left alone will only stir up some form of antagonizing behaviour from those around him. He will become the butt of a joke, the focal point of an illustration, in fact, trouble will always be directed towards him; all this is done mostly to illicit some kind of reaction from that individual, a reaction that will definitely push him out of the cage he built around himself. In my experience with it, I just had to deal with it; there are places where I’m seen as the loner, then there are places where I’m seen as the outgoing sociable type. To counter-balance my genetic trait of being mostly reserved; I chose where, when and in what situation to remain isolated; after weighing the effects of course. Whenever I did decide to keep to myself, probably as a last resort to thinking clearly and gaining perspective on an idea or object of thought, I’m usually very careful in keeping a way back into society wide open.
The more a person is in contact with others, the more graceful and at ease they become. Isolation, on the other hand, engenders awkwardness in a persons' gestures. This awkwardness is easy to sense, and will only drive the individual further into isolation.

(A good and wise prince, desirous of maintaining that character, and to avoid giving the opportunity to his sons to become oppressive, will never build fortresses, so that they may place their reliance upon the good will of their subjects, and not upon the strength of citadels, NICCOLO MACHIAVELLI, 1469-1527).

Society, Opinion And Perspective

THE CROW AND THE SHEEP
A troublesome Crow sat herself on the back of a Sheep. The sheep, much against his will, carried her backward and forward for a long time, and at last said, “If you had treated a Dog in this way, you would have had your deserts from his sharp teeth.” To this the Crow replied, “I despise the weak, and yield to the strong. I know whom I may bully, and whom I must flatter; and thus I hope to prolong my life to a good old age, (FABLES, AESOP, SIXTH CENTURY B.C).

One can never assume that everyone they come across reacts or responds in the same way to character stimulus. I know this sounds a little cliché, but no matter how much we’ve heard about how people are really very different in perspectives and opinion, we still make the mistake of thinking we can make people think and act the way we do. There are many kinds of people; choose to deceive, outmaneuver, outsmart or cajole some, they will spend the rest of their lives seeking revenge for hurting their ego. These are the wolves in lambs’ clothing, be careful never to offend this bunch and the ability to distinguish wolves from lambs, hawks from vultures, and foxes from hares is critical to our existence. Deal the same blow to every person you come across, trust me you will live a life of constant regret and frustration, if you even live that long.

During my time in the university, I had this circle of friends; close we were, we partied together, studied together, had fun together. There was one of us though who was a little bit too insecure, so much that he always took mild jokes too personal. Long story short, our friendship with him is not as solid. I will now list some categories of people we might have come across from time to time, and we can fit our friends, family and acquaintances into any of these categories.

The Hopelessly Insecure Man: People like this are hard to spot, but like my friend above it’s easy to identify them when they take jokes and whims personal. These people will attack back in little bites that will take forever to get big enough for you to notice. Please do not offend people like this, and when you do anyway, be sure to stay away from them for a very long time.

The Arrogant and Proud Man: Any man with just a little bit of touchy pride and/or ego is very dangerous when offended. These are the ones that will overreact when their ego is threatened. Don’t bother trying to figure out this person, there is no sanity in their actions.

The Serpent with a Long memory: These ones are quite dangerous; no show of the hurt-emotion makes them the ultimate destroyer. Usually they act cold, uninterested and unaffectionate but these are just fronts for how they truly feel inside. They wait patiently for the perfect time to have the last laugh.

Mr. Suspicion: People in this category are boring to be around since everything must revolve around them. They see only what they want to see-usually the worst-in other people, and imagines everyone is after their downfall. People like this are not dangerous; they however never completely trust anyone around them, which just makes them awkward.

The Plain, Unassuming, and Often Unintelligent Man: These are the rarest kind of people one can come across, usually because humans generally do not like looking stupid. People like this will deliberately act unintelligent and uninformed to make you feel in charge, when in fact they counting all your wrongs, and waiting the day they may pounce.

When you meet a swordsman, draw your sword: Do not recite poetry to one who is not a poet. (FROM A CH’AN BUDDHIST CLASSIC; QUOTED IN THUNDER IN THE SKY, TRANSLATED BY THOMAS CLEARY, 1993).

Plans And Consequence

THE TWO FROGS:
Two frogs dwelt in the same pool. The pool being dried up under the summer's heat, left it, and set out together to seek another home. As they went along they chanced to pass a deep well, amply supplied with water, and on seeing this one of the frogs said to the other: "Let us descend and make our abode in this well, it will furnish us with shelter and food." The other replied with greater caution: "But suppose the water should fail us, how can we get out again from so great a depth?"
(FABLES, AESOP, SIXTH CENTURY B.C).

Do nothing without a regard to the consequence. This might make you seem less ambitious, but it is better to be cautious than it is to be regretful of ones' actions.
The ending/ambition/goal/dream of any human is 'everything', for without any of these, one cannot but phase through life like leaves on a tree. Leaves have no sense of belonging. They are produced, they thrive, they remain green, they wither, and then they drop to the ground. That is all they do, it isn't rocket science. As humans, the ending is everything; plan all the way to it, taking into account all the possible consequences, obstacles, and twists of fortune that might reverse your hard work and give the glory to others.
Most men are ruled by the heart, not the head. Our plans are vague, and when we come across situations that prove unexpected, we improvise. Now the problem with improvisation is, it only gets us as far as the next crises. if you are not a theatre or motion picture actor, a performer and/or an entertainer, it is wise to leave improvisation techniques to those trained in it. Whilst improvising a solution can come in handy, it only postpones the crisis, it is never a substitute for thinking several steps ahead and planning to the end.

(There are very few men-and they are the exceptions-who are able to think and feel beyond the present moment, CARL VON CLAUSEWITZ, 1780-1831).

On the other hand, there are those people who are very good at setting goals for themselves, these group of people actually get what they started out for, but somewhere along the line they become so engrossed in winning, so much that coming off the attack becomes impossible. In other words, they become greedy. In reality though, aiming for a goal and keeping to it is very critical in the long run.
The person who goes too far in his triumphs creates a reaction that inevitably leads to a decline. Desires and aspirations are 'very different' from goals and dreams, most people believe that they are in fact aware of the future, that they are planning and thinking ahead. They are actually deluded: What they are actually doing is succumbing to their desires, to what they want the future to be. Plans like this are vague, based on imagination rather than reality. I myself have had to deal with desires that are really not mine per say, it is quite common with young people, although i have come across certain young people who are very focused on the task at hand because it yields their expectations in the future. There is no universal law governing the extent to which one can aspire, there is however a law that balances consequence and action.

Objectivity trumps subjectivity anytime, any day.
(He who asks fortune-tellers the future unwittingly forfeits an inner intimation of coming events that are a thousand times more exact than anything they may say, WALTER BENJAMIN, 1892-1940).

Nigeria Vs Tahiti: Confederations Cup Fixture 4/Day 3

Tahiti vs. Nigeria

Kickoff: Monday June 17 at 9 p.m. (UK)/4 p.m. (ET)

Africa Cup of Nations winners Nigeria will today have a face-off with Oceana Champions Tahiti, in their first fixture schedule at the 2013 Confederations Cup taking place in Brazil. This tournament serves as a precursor to the much hyped FIFA World Cup Tournament, with Brazil still playing host to that.

Despite a hectic buildup to the competition in which the Nigerian national team reportedly went on strike in a row over bonus payments by the Nigerian Football Federation (NFF), the expectations for the national team is nothing short of a win, a win expected to be by some considerable margin.

In a group where rivals Spain and Uruguay are anticipated to be the strongest of the four sides, racking up an impressive goal difference tally could prove important for the Super Eagles' qualification hopes.

Tahiti's pre-match press conference offered a clear indication of the challenges that lie ahead, with manager Eddy Etaeta discussing the fact that nine of his squad are currently unemployed. The rest, he said, were a mix of PE teachers, delivery men, accountants, or working in an assortment of other trades. Of their squad, only uncapped former France Under-21 striker Marama Vahirua plays football professionally. (AFP)

Just a goal at the tournament would mean a huge amount to the Tahitian side, who lost 7-0 to Chile's Under-20 squad just last week. It is likely, though, to come down to a matter of damage limitation over the next 10 days.

Recent Form:

TAHITI —Two wins, three losses (W-L-L-W-L)

NIGERIA —Two wins, three draws (W-D-D-W-D)

Appealing To The Vanity In Others

THE PEASANT AND THE APPLE-TREE
A peasant had in his garden an apple-tree, which bore no fruit, but only served as perch for the sparrows and grasshoppers. He resolved to cut it down,and, taking his ax in hand, made a bold stroke at its roots. The grasshoppers and sparrows entreated him not to cut down the tree that sheltered them, but to spare it, and they would sing to him and lighten his labors. He paid no attention to their request, but gave the tree a second and a third blow with his ax. When he reached the hollow of the tree, he found a hive full of honey. Having tasted the honeycomb, he threw down his ax, and, looking on the tree as sacred, took great care of it, (FABLES, AESOP, SIXTH CENTURY B.C).
If you need to get someone to do your bidding or perhaps do you a favour, it is wise that you appeal to his/her self-interest, for it is that alone which moves some men.

The truth about the world as we know it, is, there are very few people who genuinely and without need for reciprocation, give you what you ask. It is not an entirely negative trait, but it is a trait nonetheless. A lot of people at one time or the other may have come across a person whom they needed assistance from, but somewhere during that discussion, person A had to offer something in return to person B, so as to speed the decision process evidently going on in person B's head. Yes, we have all been there.
The trick in being successful at this though requires some kind of subtlety, you don't want to seem too manipulative, else you might end up getting the opposite of what you planned. Do not bother reminding him of your past assistance and good deeds, he/she will just find a way to ignore you. People naturally do not like being indebted to others, the reason for this mostly is because in such a situation, they feel like they don't have a choice. Instead of reminding said helper about what good deed you did before, uncover something in your request, something that will benefit him and emphasize it. Seven out of ten percent of the time, this strategy works.

(Most men are thoroughly subjective that nothing really interests them but themselves. They always think of their own case as soon as ever any remark is made, and their whole attention is engrossed and absorbed by the merest chance reference to anything which affects them personally, be it never so remote. ARTHUR SCHOPENHAUER, 1788-1860)

QUICK NOTE: A lot of people will deny they ever required something in return for the good deeds or assistance they rendered someone else. Well, don't expect otherwise. Nobody ever admits to serving their own personal interests.

Society And Relationships

We might as well admit it, we want people to like us. Quite a number of times i have heard someone say, "I don't care if they like me or not." The problem with that statement is, anytime you hear someone say it, just put it down as a fact that he/she might not exactly be telling the truth.
The psychologist, Williams Jazes said, "One of the deepest drives of human nature is the desire to be appreciated." This longing to be held in esteem, to be a sought-after person, is fundamental in us." There is however another face to this coin in popularity; by deliberately striving and working too hard in an attempt to being liked or becoming popular, the chances are you will never attain it. In other words, to be a master in the art of warming up to others, you must be artless: never should you make it so obvious as this will only push people further away from you. One important thing one must also note is that despite your effort at impressing others, not everyone will be impressed. There's no possible way to get everybody on your side, even Jesus experienced this after feeding five thousand men, some of wish i bet were most certainly among those who led him to his death on the cross.
Inter-personal relationships between humans is one of the more complex scientific postulates, even the issue of creation pitting biological evolution against God's Creation of humans is no match for it. Yes, one can never fully understand human behaviour. Psychologists who pride themselves on being knowledgeable in human relations never use the exact same method of approach on two different people or situations. We are by nature a difficult and complex species but this does not limit us in any way, because if you are a 'difficult' person by nature, shy and retiring or even unsociable, you can make yourself into one who enjoys an easy, normal, natural, and a pleasing relationship with others.
To be liked is of profounder importance than mere ego satisfaction, and as necessary as that is to one's success in life, normal and satisfactory personal relations are even more important; without it, your climb to achieving your goals and dreams will just be that, mere dreams. The feeling of not being wanted or needed is one of the more devastating of all human emotions, though acknowledging this fact is quite difficult, it is the truth. In my opinion, this need to feel among the societal pack, is one reason why most people act in a manner they themselves don't enjoy, but which they often employ only because of their desire to have people like them. Everywhere i go i see people putting up an act by going to extremes in their dressing, manner of speech, hairstyle, and so on.
If you are one of those who secretly feel the need to becoming popular or liked by others, my best advice for you is this; be yourself, but this doesn't mean one should always act in their own self-interests. Whether we like it or not, we are definitely going to need someone to help us sometime and if you make the mistake of thinking this someone will be a friend or family member, then you are in for a surprise. The best assistance you can ever receive is usually from someone you never thought would come through for you. Do not build fortresses around yourself, isolation is dangerous.

Be convinced that there are no persons so insignificant and inconsiderable, but may some time or another, have it in their power to be of use to you; which they certainly will not if you have once shown them contempt. Wrongs are often forgiven but contempt never is. Our pride remembers it forever, (LORD CHESTERFIELD, 1694-1773).

Project Fame Season Three Winner Chidinma: New Video

So yeah, i admit i kind of have a crush on this petite performer/musician. During the airing of Project-fame West Africa, season three, i would only tune in on Sundays so i could catch a glimpse of her rendering her version of selected hit songs, and oh did she have a good voice. It did not come as a surprise when she won, i was expecting it.
With a beautiful voice, attention-grabbing good looks and an exciting positive outward demeanor, Chiidinma stole my heart, just for that period anyway.. She's back with a brand new video for the track 'Emi ni baller' featuring Tha Suspect and Illbliss

Watch video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H5z4ipCynfc&feature=player_embedded#t=26s

Saying Less Than Necessary

I realized from personal experience that the less i spoke, the more i was considered a quiet and shy person. Truthfully speaking, i really am neither, but seeing as humans are a creature of habit, i feel the need to say very little when around those I'm not yet totally comfortable with. Now this in no way makes me a manipulator of sorts, it just gives me enough airtime to listen to what others are saying... It works my friends and it's been proven by countless courtiers, kings and the philosophers who lived before us. Habitually, humans will always try to feel the void of an awkward silence and when this urge bursts open, they reveal a lot about themselves and their ideas without knowing it. It is now up to the awkwardly quiet guy in the room to pay very close attention. We get to understand people better this way. There is a downside to this though, one must never be too silent, it's a good strategy to always chip in during a discussion and smile at every other person's joke even if it isn't really funny. And if you're going to say something banal, it will seem original if you make it vague, open-ended and sphinx-like. Intelligent and powerful people impress and intimidate by saying less. The more you talk, the more likely you are to say something foolish.

Here are some real-life situations involving people who spoke very little but wielded some form of power nonetheless:

> Down on his luck, [the screenwriter] Michael Arlen went to New York in 1944. To drown his sorrows he paid a visit to the famous restaurant "21". In the lobby, he ran into Sam Goldwyn, who offered the somewhat impractical advice that he should buy racehorses. At the bar Arlen met Louis B. Mayer, an old acquaintance, who asked him what were his plans for the future. "I was just talking to Sam Goldwyn..." began Arlen. "How much did he offer you?" Mayer interrupted. "Not enough," Arlen replied evasively. "Would you take fifteen thousand for thirty weeks?" asked Mayer. Without hesitation this time, Arlen replied "Yes, of course".
(THE LITTLE BROWN BOOK OF ANECDOTES, CLIFTON FADIMAN, ED.. 1985)
By keeping the details of his conversation with Sam Goldwyn, Michael Arlen caused a stir in Louis B. Mayer by telling him Sam had offered him money but this offered money was not enough. Louis had to pay him to keep him for himself and not for Sam who maybe was a rival in the business of film making.

> The King [Louis XIV] was a man of very few words, his most famous remark is "L'etat, c'est moi" (I am the state); nothing could be more pithy yet more eloquent. He maintained the most impenetrable secrecy about affairs of state, never divulging state affairs except with his ministers in council. But even in lending his ministers this privilege, he only confides his plans to them after reflecting at length (alone) and coming to a decision. His infamous "I shall see" was one of several extremely short phrases he used to defer a meeting.

Undutiful words of a subject do often take deeper roots than the memory of ill-deeds... The late Earl of Essex told Queen Elizabeth that her conditions were as crooked as her carcass; but it cost him his head, which his insurrection had not cost him but for that speech, (SIR WALTER RALEIGH, 1554-1618).

Oysters open completely when the moon is full; and when a crab sees one, it throws a piece of stone or seaweed into it and the oyster cannot close again so that it serves the crab for meat. Such is the fate of him who opens his mouth too much and thereby puts himself at the mercy of the listener, (LEONARDO DA VINCI, 1452-1519).

NIGERIA: D'banj releases the music video for 'Don't Tell Me Nonsense'

DKM (The King's Men) crooner D'banj has unleashed a completely new and wild music video for the track 'Don't Tell me Nonsense' off his upcoming DKM compilation album. The video also features dance diva 'Kaffy' who made the video feel even hotter.

http://www.vanguardngr.com/2013/06/dbanj-unleashes-dont-tell-me-nonsense-video/

NIGERIA: Amnesty International's Take On The State Of Emergency And Civilian Casualties

AMNESTY INTERNATIONAL'S LUCY FREEMAN:
Nigerian authorities must not use the state of emergency imposed in the north of the country as an excuse to commit human rights violations, Amnesty International urged today as the military continued its assault on Islamist armed group Boko Haram.

Several people have reportedly been killed and hundreds arrested since a state of emergency was declared in the northern states of Adamawa, Borno and Yobe on 14 May. The military reportedly claim those targeted are suspected members of Boko Haram.

Some 2,400 people have fled the region for neighbouring Niger, according to a statement released on Tuesday by the International Committee of the Red Cross.

"Issues of national security and the state of emergency do not give the military carte blanche to do whatever they want," said Lucy Freeman, Amnesty International's Deputy Director for Africa.

“The onus is on the state to prove that they are not using an emergency as justification to run roughshod over people’s human rights.

”Over the past three years, Amnesty International documented grave human rights violations committed by security forces in their response to Boko Haram, including extra-judicial executions, enforced disappearances, indiscriminate torching of civilian housing and arbitrary detention.

In recent weeks, residents of Borno state in northern Nigeria have told Amnesty International that mass arrests in the state capital Maiduguri have increased.

Detainees continue to be denied access to lawyers and families and are not being charged with any crimes or brought before a court. Many people have spent more than a year in military detention without being tried or even charged with any crimes. Others have simply disappeared.

Individuals in military vehicles have been depositing bodies on an almost daily basis at mortuaries in the town. The government does not appear to carry out any investigation into these deaths, and has not released any information pertaining to those deceased and deposited at the mortuaries.

"The government must immediately launch a full and effective investigation into the many recent deaths and disappearances in Borno state, including looking closely at how dead individuals end up in the back of military vehicles,” said Lucy Freeman.

Many people have fled their homes, with some areas of the city gradually becoming ‘ghost towns.’ Public schools have closed as parents are too scared to send their children to school.

A dusk-to-dawn curfew has been imposed in some areas, which the Special Advisor to the President on Public Affairs said would facilitate house-to-house searches.

Over the past two years, Amnesty International has received consistent accounts from witnesses who have seen people summarily executed outside their homes by soldiers during operations in the area, including house searches.

"Given the history of human rights violations by the security forces during house-to house-searches, any escalation of such operations is extremely concerning," said Lucy Freeman.

"The security forces appear to have repeatedly used firearms against people when there is no imminent threat of death or serious injury." The Special Advisor added that the curfew would mean only “troublemakers or those that want to confront the military” would break the curfew, and that those people “will be dealt with summarily”.

"The Special Advisor seems to suggest a ‘shoot on sight’ approach to anyone who breaks the curfew," said Lucy Freeman.

“Whatever the emergency, a state can never derogate from the fundamental principle of the presumption of innocence.

"The Nigerian government has rarely carried out investigations into allegations of human rights violations by the security forces.

"President Goodluck Jonathan must order the military to respect human rights and the rule of law The military is not above the law," said Lucy Freeman.

"The government has an obligation to ensure the safety of all Nigerians, firstly by addressing the attacks from Boko Haram, but also by eliminating the human rights violations carried out by the very state security forces who are supposed to provide protection.

http://www.amnesty.org/en/news/nigeria-state-emergency-2013-05-22

Messi Accused of Tax Fraud

World footballer of the year, Lionel Messi (Pictured below) is being investigated on charges of alleged tax fraud running into millions of euros (£3.4m precisely)
The interesting thing about this is the fact that Lionel's father is suspected of being the accomplice.. talk about sticking together in family values, they both deny the claims though which isn't a real surprise because i was not expecting they admit to such. Lionel Messi's football career might just be at stake, but that does not make him any less of an entertaining as well as gifted athlete.

The Art of Wisdom and Stupidity

Now, there is nothing of which a man is prouder than of intellectual ability, for it is this that gives him his commanding place in the animal world. It is an exceedingly rash thing to let anyone see that you are decidedly superior to him in this respect, and to let other people see it too...
Hence, while rank and riches may always reckon upon differential treatment in society; that is something that intellectual ability can never expect. To be ignored is the greatest favor shown to it, and if people notice it at all, it is because they regard it as a piece of impertinence, or else as something to which its possessor has no legitimate right and upon which he dares to pride himself. In retaliation and revenge for his conduct, people secretly try to humiliate him in some other way; and even if they hesitate to do this, it is only because they seek a fitting opportunity.
A man may be as humble as possible in his demeanor, and yet hardly ever get people to overlook his crime in standing intellectually above them. In the Garden of Roses, Sadi makes the remark: “You should know that foolish people are a hundredfold more averse to meeting the wise than the wise are indisposed for the company of the foolish.”
On the other hand, it is a real recommendation to be decidedly stupid at appropriate times. For just as warmth is agreeable to the body, so it does the mind good to feel its superiority; and a man will usually seek the company of someone likely to give him this feeling, as instinctively as he would approach a fireplace or walk in the sun to get warm. But this also means that he will be disliked on account of his superiority.
If a man out of the necessity in trying to further his cause to being liked, then he must act or seem inferior in point of intellect and never give off a highly intellectual charisma and/or demeanor, as this will only serve fatal to his motive.
(ARTHUR SCHOPENHAUER, 1788-1860)

Here’s a story a friend of mine told me recently, written in first-person perspective: There is this church I attend every Sunday, truth be told I am actually just a Sunday-Sunday Christian but that’s beside the point. Most of my fellow members have come to know me as that guy they saw only on Sundays and maybe on special occasions during the week, this is quite understandable because my parents attend the same church; in fact I was born into it, and with a congregation numbering just about a thousand, everyone seems to know everyone else at least on facial recognition basis. The point here is, seeing as I was a natural born member of this church, it is imperative that I be a more dedicated member, I personally do not share in that sentiment. Now, I know you (myself here as the writer) will be judging this situation but the thing is I really don’t get inspired anymore by the spiritual standing of the congregation... The resentment for me by some fellow members came to an all-time high when last Sunday, during a program, specific references were made publicly from the pulpit to me and my unending cycle of withdrawal from church activities. Someone even walked up to me after service and told me to my face that the reason for my lack of enthusiasm stems from my feeling of superiority among other members. I was dumbfounded, “Where did that idea come from?” I asked myself quietly. But what I now understood was that behaviour such as mine actually came off to others as superiority complex, which is totally not how I intended at all...
That story by my friend proves in fact that people will not like you for being different, and if they pretend they did, it would be because they were waiting for a time when they can say it to your face or probably humiliate and embarrass you, just to feed their ego. This happens to almost everyone, there’s no rule certifying who and who gets to be disliked for being intellectually superior; even just being different from a pack evokes the exact same emotion from other people in that same pack.
Given how important the idea of intelligence is to most people’s vanity, it is critical never inadvertently to insult or impugn a person’s brain power. To reveal the true nature of your intelligence rarely pays; you should get in the habit of downplaying it at ‘appropriate times’.

“Know how to make use of stupidity: The wisest man plays this card at times. There are occasions when the highest wisdom consists in appearing not to know, you must not be ignorant but you must be capable of playing it. It is not much good being wise among fools and sane among lunatics. He who poses as a fool is not a fool. The best way to be well received by all is to clothe yourself in the skin of the dumbest of brutes. (Baltasar Gracian, 1601-1658)”

What Do I Know?

Anywhere I go I seem to subconsciously observe a lot, like I said ‘subconsciously’...so my writing this is in no way trying to make myself look wise or overly sensible. I believe that wisdom is in perspective, a quality seen in us by other people we come across daily.
Now talking about wisdom, we have all heard time and time again that saying, “What an old man will see sitting down, a child will not see standing straight up” (Nigerian Proverb). Well I guess I do agree just a little bit with this sentiment because wisdom does actually come with experience and experience with age. Now this is my opinion on this; because this statement subscribes to an unproven fact regarding wisdom as being a quality associated with old age, there is a lot of bias regarding the intelligence and/or intuition of a young man/woman acting on his guts. Why you may ask? It is because anytime an adolescent or young adult does/says something that does not resonate well with the elderly person’s perspective of the world, even if it is logically and realistically correct, that seemingly logical thing gets tagged as wrong. Our world is in a constant state of evolution and change; meaning our values, morals, ethics and every other social vice never stays the same way over an extended period of time, right? But what do I know...
Quite a large number of people have been made to believe the best and most fail-safe way to becoming wealthy, rich or successful results from praying and fighting against the vices of imaginary enemies. Ok, so yes there will always be enemies around you and not everyone will like you even when you are good to them. The thing is I believe that the more enemies there are around you, the more influential and powerful you seem. In fact if you don’t have enemies in your life, you’re really not a big deal and that’s just the way it is. Praying for death and ill-will on your enemies only makes you bitter inside and that is not healthy, plus if that was the best way to treat enemies, it would have been written somewhere in the bible, right? Does this kind of antagonizing prayer not contradict the bible passage that says, “Pray for those who hurt you and do good to them that persecute you”? But what do I know...

(In a speech delivered by Abraham Lincoln at the height of the American Civil War, he referred to the southerners as fellow human beings who were in error. An elderly woman chastised him for not calling them irreconcilable enemies who must be destroyed. “Why, madam,” Lincoln replied, “Do I not destroy my enemies when I make them my friends?”)


“Government is for the people and by the people.” This statement has been said countless times and still, it never gets old. Very few of us will have something good to say about our government and rightly so because there’s really not much good to be said. So you did that road, built that school, even trained a few indigenous people in professional fields but what matters in the end is, was there meaningful change? The answer to that question could be maybe or maybe not, but i have learnt from experience not to take anything about the government at face value. I’m not even going to talk much on this issue before someone somewhere uses me as a scapegoat for my troubles, right? But what do I know...
Education is the bed-rock of all societies. It is now common knowledge that Nigerian university degrees have very little relevance in the world global market-place. Why is that you may ask? I’m sure everyone also has an answer to this but here is my candid opinion, “They are just too damn much.” I’m not saying this is not a good thing but you see, I’d rather there be infrastructural and content improvement in a few existing schools than racking up so many that lack in quality. That being said, for a country like ours, the tertiary educational system should pride itself on quality assessment and not quantity survey. Why can’t the number of tertiary institutions present in a Geo-political zone be limited to a maximum of five? A university, a technical institution, a college of education, another state-run university and one scientific research institute, right? But what do I know...
A Congregation of saints... Doesn’t this phrase sound a little too good to be true? Ok, maybe it just is to me but that said, I’ve come to understand that phrases and statements used to qualify a group of people is almost usually never true to each person in that group, meaning not a lot of members in that congregation might actually be saint-ish. So you went to that Sunday service and you got pissed (Note: I used pissed, the least form of anger), because someone did not look at you right, or did not say hello to you, or did not socialize with you after the Sunday service, or did not say congratulations to you on your thanksgiving... oh my, this list can go on and on but you all get the point. So you got pissed, right? Well here’s my question, “What was your exact reason for going to church on that Sunday? I’m sure you know the answer, right? But me, what do I know...
I know I am a good looking guy. Yes I said it! Now I know some are already judging and concluding that I may just be the biggest narcissist they ever came across. In fact, maybe some are already wondering how arrogant I must be for mentioning it at all. That said, it is completely normal and perhaps even right for people to think that way. A lot of cute-faced guys and girls are going to share in this sentiment with me, the sentiment that predominantly emanates from the fact that the way they look is almost always used as an axis for the criticism of the characters (good or bad) that they exhibit. I’ll give an example, “You walk into a place (could be anywhere really), and you did not acknowledge the presence of the people in that place when you walked in, probably maybe because you were so lost in your head thinking about something really important and you just did not feel like saying hi, right?” Well I bet you, almost everyone present in that place who noticed you come in or through and expected you notice them as well, automatically concludes, “Oh, this person is just so full of himself.”
Now, let me twist this one scenario two ways for you readers, “You’re at a party, the song just came on and everyone is asked to come on the dance floor, but you’re tired so you sat back, right?” This might just be the opinion of the more energetic individuals at the party, “Look at him/her, just sitting there acting aloof and uninterested, so arrogant.”
Now here’s the twist: “same scenario”, right? But this time you actually got up there on the dance floor and you rocked it. In fact, you rocked it so good that everyone else started looking bad, right? Well this becomes their opinion, “Just Look at him/her acting like they own the place, in other words, showing off.”

This is my opinion, “When you have a pretty face regardless of gender, there are two conclusions most people will have of you. First, a shy good looking person is always seen as aloof hence arrogant. Second, an expressive good looking person who struts around comfortably will be seen as a show-off.” Thing is, as the good looking person you are, you should already know you will attract attention quite a lot based on your looks so just deal with it already. Be yourself and don’t give a nickel’s damn of what others might think about your actions, in-actions and reactions, right? But what do I know...

Five Virtues Of The Cock

While serving under the duke Ai of Lu, T'ien Jao, resenting his obscure position, said to his master, "I am going to wander far away like a snow goose."
"What do you mean by that?" inquired the duke. "Do you see the cock?" said T'ien Jao in reply, its crest is a symbol of civility; its powerful talons suggest strength; its daring to fight any enemy denotes courage; its instinct to invite others whenever food is obtained shows benevolence; and last but not least, its punctuality in keeping the time through the night gives us an example of veracity. In spite, however, of these five virtues, the cock is daily killed to fill a dish on your table. Why? The reason is that it is found within our reach. On the other hand, the snow goose traverses in one flight a thousand. Resting in your garden, it preys on your fishes and turtles and pecks your millet. Though devoid of any of the cock's five virtues, yet you prize this bird for the sake of its scarcity. This being so, I shall fly far like a snow goose.
ANCIENT CHINESE PARABLES, YU HSIU SEN, ED.. 1974

MORAL:
Use absence to increase your value, respect and maybe even honor

The story of 'the five virtues of the cock' does not infer in totality that absence is a prerequisite for respect and/or value. In the case of a love affair, absence at the beginning of a relationship will do the exact opposite by causing yourself to be forgotten. At a point where an affair has developed to a certain extent of undiluted love and strong emotions, it is often wise to become scarce as this will not only make hearts grow fonder but also increases value and respect by evoking emotions of abandonment.
Once a person dies, everything about that person will seem different. He/she will be surrounded by an instant aura of respect. People will remember their criticisms of you, their arguments with you, and will be filled with regret and guilt. They start missing that presence that will never return. But you do not have to wait until death comes calling, make yourself scarce by deliberate absence and it's an added advantage if you have a certain talent or skill that will be missed while you're gone.

A man said to a dervish: "Why do i not see you often?" The Dervish replied, "Because the words 'Why have you not been seen by me?' are sweeter to my ear than the words 'Why have you come again?'" (Mulla Jami, quoted in Idries Shah's Caravan of Dreams, 1968)

Absence diminishes minor passions and inflames great ones, as the wind douses a candle and fans a fire (La Rochefoucauld, 1613-1680)

The Snake, The Farmer, And The Heron

A snake chased by hunters asked a farmer to save its life. to hide it from its pursuers, the farmer squatted and let the snake crawl into its belly. But when the danger had passed and the farmer asked the snake to come out, the snake refused. It was warm and safe inside. On his way home, the farmer saw a Heron and went up to him to whisper what had happened. The Heron told him to squat and strain to eject the snake. When the snake stuck its head out, the heron caught it, pulled it out and killed it. The farmer was worried that the snake's poison might still be inside him, and the heron told him that the cure for snake poison was to cook and eat six white fowl. "You're a white fowl," said the farmer. "You'll do for a start." He grabbed the heron, put it in a bag and carried it home where he hung it up while he told his wife what had happened. "I'm surprised at you." said the wife. "The bird does you a kindness, rids you of the evil in your belly, saves your life in fact, yet you catch it and talk of killing it." She immediately released the heron, and it flew away. But on its way, it gouged out her eyes.

MORAL: When you see water flowing uphill, it means that someone is repaying a kindness (Culled from African Folk Tales)

The story above does not prove to dis-credit the sanctity of trust but it is an eye opener though. The truth of the matter is, not everyone or everything should be trusted at first glance and/or action. In other words, never put too much trust in friends, learn how to use enemies also. They come in handy at times and truth be told, a old enemy is usually more trust-worthy than an old friend. The reason for this is, while an old friend can take you for granted because of the friendship you share, an old enemy who now has become a friend has a lot to prove to you.

As Baldassare Castiglione(1478-1529) wrote, "Thus for my own part i have more than once been deceived by the person i loved most and of whose love, above everyone else's, i have been most confident. So that i believe that it may be right to serve one person above all others, according to merit and worth, but never to trust so much in this tempting trap of friendship as to have cause to repent of it later on."