The Convict's Note

Dearest,
We talked about all the wonderful things we could do together, the places we could go and never come back if we chose. You asked that I tell you everything there was to know about me, and when I did, you never ceased asking if I had told you all of it. Your willingness to let yourself feel and live every inch of my life like it was yours gave me a sense of belonging and purpose. How much I long to hold and kiss you one more time.
While I can honestly say I told you the truth, I feel ashamed to admit I may have kept some things from you; things I could not bring myself to accept, let alone tell anyone else. I am at my corridor’s end now, and not the same man I once was; I feel it is time you knew it all.
A short time ago right before we became lovers, I had involved myself in the most vile of evils; an evil by which most men at some point in their lives came to succumb and are consumed by. One by which they may later seek a means of escape but naught succeed. The lust for power it was my dear, a force so strong, much to the point I killed for - and this secret to be kept sacred, required even more death when necessary.

Of the few noble and upright men to walk the short phase of life, I say with utmost certainty, I did not belong.
My dearest Catherine, please do not let them say I lived an unfulfilled life; for maybe by ignorance or misinformation, they seldom display their knowledge of what your presence made of me. I have always known about karma and the tales of legend it beckoned, perhaps, I had felt my life’s cycle might be exempted for sake of your love; wishful thinking it was, I now reckon – my past did finally catch up to me.
The fear of death had lingered, ever present in my consciousness, but often made minuscule only by the ecstasy of your love making – at least, Hemingway spoke rightly on this one thing. It is in fact true by all that breathes and lives, what a great woman you are indeed.
I do not intend that you pity or feel sorry for me, nor do I wish you repent ever knowing me. It is my intention as always my darling that you know; I barely live when I’m not with you.
Sitting here locked up as cow in barn does not do much for my psyche knowing my time is almost up. They say my execution will stay quick and painless, but I’ll be damned if I let another man decide how I go out.
Dying is nothing to me now, for I have neither picture nor fear of it in my mind anymore; the life you will live after my demise beclouds all imagination as strongly as thunderstorms are to rainy day.
If I could bare my heart to you in person as I do now, I would my love, only I have no such luck anymore. Truthfully, luck and I went separate ways a long time ago, our last encounter being the day you opened your heart to me.
But who knows? Maybe I am in luck today once again, for I know this note will find you in best of health and good spirit.
Walking down a different path might have escaped me this fate, but on the other hand, it also would have denied me the pleasure of knowing you – my regrets stand biased.
I do believe I have told you now, all there is to know about me Catherine, and if by any chance my luck runs full on this day, I also believe you have forgiven my choice to keep from loving ears as yours, my past crimes.

Yours,
D.J Price

Marvin's Room

Standing a few feet away was the most beautiful person I ever laid eyes on. There was something different about this one, something indescribable – it felt almost like she didn’t know how attractive she was, how charming and bright her smile was – with a walk mimicking the sway of wild grass in the wind, she strode like she never owned a single worry in the world. Is that it? I thought. I definitely could wait no further to find out.
As I inched closer, I must have tried at least twice to discourage myself from making this move, maybe because my heart pumped really fast and loud full of nervous energy, I just could not stop my stomach grunting the whole way. What are you doing man? I stopped suddenly like someone who just remembered he had control of his legs. There’s no way I’m having a decent pick-up conversation with this woman, at least not in my present state.
Taking a full step back, I noticed the empty chair beside me. I wasn’t going anywhere soon and neither was she; the rain storm had for once served my purpose perfectly, all flights were being delayed. Now I was to enjoy the luxury of not knowing her, this way I could try to understand her before making any moves.

Angie had turned out to be exactly as I imagined the whole twenty minutes I spent sitting a few feet away from her at the airport lounge – we boarded the same flight and except for some inexplicable coincidental trick of nature, sat right next to each other on the plane. She didn’t seem pretentious, neither was she overly conceited. Heck, she acted so unaware of her aesthetic physical appearance, making her all the more appealing to me; I definitely had my fill of women who took themselves too seriously. If Angie and I were to spend a night together, and the very next morning it took her forever getting dressed, I wasn’t going to get pissed – I would simply acknowledge her effort is what I would do, she deserved that.

....and after the usual corny conversations....

Angie only smiled and looked away, she didn’t utter a single word – I felt violated. My heart stung a bit because now I was not sure if what I said had been a mistake. To make matters worse, she got her ear phones from her carry-on bag and put them on. I am so stupid, I thought to myself. I really wished I could change seats that moment, but that was never going to happen – though I felt embarrassed, I still didn’t want to give up – I mean who knows, maybe if I moved from my sitting position, another guy would take advantage and make his own move; I definitely am not the only cat with an eye and nose for sexuality, besides, I could tell this lotus liked persistence, I knew her type all too well and I’ll be damned if I didn’t get a soft landing after all this to soothe my bruised ego.

Having a drink with some friends at a bar was the best way to ease the stress after a day’s work. I checked my phone, saw a few missed calls and one text message – it was from Angie, she must have sent me a text because I wasn’t picking up my calls. Why on earth was she calling me today? I thought. It had been two weeks since the flight incident and though we exchanged numbers on arrival, I wasn’t quite certain if she agreed to it for sake of courtesy or for genuine interest in me. Well truthfully, I did lean more towards the choice of courtesy and really did not expect a second meet between us. We did have a conversation towards the end of the flight but that was just about every other random thing I could conjure up, now she wanted to see me and I wasn't gonna miss it.

I arrived a full fifteen minutes past 9:30 pm – and there she was looking better and hotter than I remember, sitting at a far left side, and almost hidden corner of the room. I did return a call during the ride down to the restaurant to acknowledge receipt of her text, as well as to voice my surprise at it. I was a mess when I arrived and she let me know right up – my breath smelled of alcohol mixed with cigarette smoke, sleeves on my blue shirt folded up to elbows and half tucked into plain black trousers, with some drops of sweat on my face. She was quite casual herself– wearing a plain white t-shirt, light blue jean bum-shorts that revealed full thighs and the slender calves of her lower legs. Her hair was tied into a pony-tail leaving a face so beautiful and detailed I could see every single muscle on it twitch then turn into a charming seductive smile when I offered my complement.

The last time was awesome, all the lines we crossed them, the air felt right, and the room was alive around us. The mirror on the wall by the dresser reflected an extremely sexy silhouette of the woman whom just made love to me – she tasted so good I couldn’t stop smacking my lips, her moans and cries urged me on and I could tell exactly what tempo she preferred anytime I noticed a change in the intensity of her sounds – she loved to talk crazy, I urged her on to talk crazy. Our bodies were in rhythm and she loved it as much, even better than I did. She couldn’t wait to get there, I told her she didn’t have to rush it and that I was truly deeply sorry for the wait – I valued every second of her like added time in a game of football (soccer), and I chose to stay current like waters in a lake while still moving all around like waters in a cycle. She had taken my reason to every high standing elevation present in the room, and every other place except personal; this was not the time to disagree or pick a quarrel. Angie chose to stay versatile in any kind of position by displaying her feline tendencies.
We had made way to my place after the restaurant; it was not rocket science trying to figure out what would happen next. She sent a text to see me, I came and the rest was to play out exactly how she wanted it to. This was unlike any other bout of orgasmic delusions though, I mean the intensity was heightened to uncontrollable heights, and it definitely had something to do with the emotions, sexuality and erotic fantasies she evoked.
Perhaps some part of our rhythmic ecstasy made it emotional, every regret and action during our flight the day we first laid eyes had been put into perspective and was worth the awkwardness of it all. I called her babe, she called me beau – reaffirming to let me know it’s all mine, and I said fine – that was all I ever wanted in the first place, not just the physicality of her entire being but also the emotional attachment that comes with it. I liked her at first sight, and now, I was totally in love after the first night.

One Long Night

It is 02:47am, I should be asleep but I'm not, instead, i lay motionless on my queen size bed staring up into the ceiling, faintly hearing the hush sound of music streaming from my eight-year old Sony Deck Disc Player just across the room. "I guess i should turn it off," I think to myself. "No, maybe not." I decide to turn the volume all the way down just enough to avoid an echo through the walls into the next room.
I can hear Steve blowing snore trumpets that interrupt my thought pattern intermittently. I wonder how his girlfriend could sleep cozily next to him all night long without smothering him with a pillow, maybe relationships do work after all. In spite of all these distractions, my mind still finds time to wander in thoughts - thoughts about my sanity. "Why am i getting depressed more often, why do i feel empty inside, why does every other thing seem not to make sense?" I usually am a lot more exciting and fun - I do marijuana, party with alcohol, never stay single too long, and combine all these with a study/work schedule that keeps me on track.
"Is it the marijuana?" I ask myself. "Is this the reason i feel depressed? Have I had too much of it enough to mess with my senses?" I keep thinking. But I'm not addicted to the stuff. Gordon my next door neighbor still seems really smart and quick-witted despite the fact that he can’t go a single day without smoking at least three rolls of the 'green weed' - one when he wakes up in the morning, one when he returns home anytime of the day and one at night just before going to bed - he is so typical. "How can that possibly be the reason," I do recall getting paranoid sometimes just after I smoke a joint but who doesn't anyway, and in my opinion there are only a few side effects associated with marijuana such as hunger, sleep, excessive laughter, unnecessary happiness, headache, drowsy eyes and paranoid thoughts, depending on how the users' system functions. A smile cuts across my face bringing with it a memory of me explaining all that to an old professor of mine.

My thoughts suddenly reverse time-jump to my early teenage years, a time in my life I consider myself free from all vices, evils and negative habits. Yes, I was the dictionary definition of naivety in the flesh. I remember once loosing out on having hot passionate sex with a lady friend back then because I was scared, not that I knew exactly what to do past the kissing and minimal hand-to-boob contact anyway - what a novice I was.
I was innocent, a trait which for some reason girls my age found attractive, I still don’t understand why. Now add innocence to my adolescent charm and striking good looks back then, I was a hot spot for young girls my age, even among some older ones. During my time in junior secondary school - the equivalent for middle-school in some countries, I met my present girlfriend. She was a classmate, quite pretty and from western Nigeria. Folake had a huge crush on me for a while before I started noticing her stares, this in turn made me crush on her as well. She was wild to the bone, although she usually came off as shy and quiet to people she wasn't friends with.
One day, strolling down the hallway, She pulled me aside and asked me to spare her some time. According to her she needed help with some class note arrangements - she was head prefect. She said it had something to do with matching the notes to practical workbooks for each student, I really wasn’t listening; I was more interested in staring her up and down. She must have said something about waiting on me in the staff room, because all I could manage out my mouth was, "I’ll meet you there."
My close friends did not relent in trying to find out exactly what Folake and I talked about, more importantly, they wanted to know why she would ask me for assistance. I was the type who sat closer to the back end of the class than the front end; I had excellent grades but I and my group of friends were not listed among the overly enthusiastic students who acted overly studious for teachers to take notice. We didn’t care much for that as long as we got the notes and read it all.
I took a leave from my friends and proceeded to the staff room where i met Folake already sorting through, she must have assumed I was not coming because she looked quite surprised to see me. Why isn't the class assistant helping you do this, that's his job description, right? I quipped. Oh don't be silly, I wanted to spend some alone time with you but you’re always with those clown friends of yours, she replied. I was caught unaware, and kept totally mum because I had nothing to say.
Let’s get started, she said, breaking the silence that enveloped our presence. I moved closer, looked around the staff room to see just two teachers at their tables intently focused on whatever it was they were grading - I was convinced they didn’t hear the conversation between myself and Folake, nor did they care to. We finished sorting amidst a silence that lasted the entire time probably because I was too careful about saying the wrong thing - she must have not had much to say herself.
I’m going to get my bags, may I get yours for you? She asked. Yes please, I answered with a smile as she headed out. I followed closely behind so we could meet at the top of the stair-well leading down the four floored building block. How about we go to my place, I live really close to school and would like to have you over for some cold drinks as appreciation. I definitely was not planning to refuse such an offer. Sure why not, I replied.
It was fun hanging out at her place - we chatted and laughed while sipping cold beverages with biscuits - she had a nice looking home, almost like not a lot of people lived in it. It was really very tidy, quite unlike mine where my two brothers, myself and our little sister lived - ours was nowhere near as tidy as hers. She lived alone with her dad, her mom lived mostly in the US but often came for visits - there really was no one to mess up the house. By the end of our 'date', i had fallen deep in love with Folake, I even lost track of time and had to hurry my way back home just to avoid the questionnaire that was bound to follow.
Is this the time you now close from school? Why are you just returning? Only one person could be daring to ask me such questions, mom would still be at work and dad worked out of town. It was Agatha,my aunt. She had this urge to always boss me around like she was trying hard to assert her authority over me, but I never let her gain ground - I always talked back at her any time she tried pulling rank. On this particular day though, I was too much in a good mood to be stubborn, so I just walked past her hissing loudly enough for her to hear it. I kept thinking about Folake and all that went down at our 'date', trying to relive every moment of it in my head.

The sound of Imogen Heap’s Hide and Seek echoing on the ringtone of Annie’s cell phone jolts me from lost thoughts on ambivalent past memories. "Why should i be depressed?" I ask myself. My life is not so bad after all, and even if it were, I am so grateful I still have Folake in it - she makes every other thing right. I guess maybe i just let things get to me too easily, maybe I should appreciate what I have more than just worrying about what I don't, regardless of my bi-polarity.
"So you played music all through the night again?" I hear Annie’s voice sipping through the opening on the door to my bed room, her cell phone ringing must have awoken her fully - Annie is in a relationship with my flat mate, Steve. If only Folake had spent the night like we agreed, maybe I won't be loosing sleep and over thinking my depression all through the night - She's on call at the hospital anyway, I say to myself.
It has to be morning already for Annie to be fully awake, enough for her to come spying in on me and my business - she does that quite a lot - I reach out for my cell phone sitting on a stool right beside my bed. I was right, my insomnia just hit an all time high, it is now 05:15am and I didn't get any sleep.

The Pain Diaries

Pain can do either one of two things: It could break us down or build us up, there are however instances when it does both sequentially. By breaking us down, we could gain some perspective on how to lift ourselves up.
Heart-break, disappointment, broken relationships, underachieved goals, are all examples of situations that evoke some amount of pain. A lot of people try to make believers of themselves by continuously affirming statements like, 'I do not care what people think of me', 'I am a tough person', 'I don't let things get to me easily', 'I can do it myself', etc. These are just few of many phrases we usually say to make ourselves feel better, when in reality, we might be hurting.

On a sunny Saturday afternoon some ten years ago, I had just done my morning chores - now getting ready to meet some friends of mine, my Motorola-branded cell rang - it was Anita. Anita and I had been dating for about a month or so, she was a goddess at least in my own eyes. Light of skin, dark brown eyes, and lips that made pink flowers the world over ashamed of themselves. what she lacked in physical appearance, she made up for in character - very kind and sweet she was. I flaunted her whenever I could and as a teen, I was quite proud of myself - I had an angel for a girlfriend.
Maybe I made her feel too special or maybe I got boring, maybe she thought herself too beautiful to be in a committed relationship - I still don't know - that call though, I still know all about it, it definitely did the damage it was meant for. Anita had broken up with me and girl did not seem tense about it at all, in fact, it was more like a casual greeting exchanged between neighbours during the wee hours of the morning - so straight forward it was, no plea, no reason, and definitely no hormone-induced exchange. I was young and that was hurtful. I have since recovered.

'Terror' was the name given to a cross-bred German-shepherd puppy of ours. He grew quite big for his age, at six months he could stand on his hind legs and be face to face with me standing at five foot-ten - very bubbly and quite fun to be around, he ate almost every other left-over we had to offer - the canine had no restraint whatsoever when it came to food, this just made him all the more delightful to have around. I had just returned home during a mid-semester break, tired and hungry I made for my bed. Maybe because it was assumed I already knew, no one told me Terror had died - it wasn't until the next morning I realized the compound was unusually quiet. "Well of course," I thought to myself, there was no sound of growling or barking. "Where is that fat dog," I asked. "Oh I thought you knew, he died two weeks ago." It was anger I felt, probably because I blamed the dog keeper for not paying close attention to Terror's health.

Writing my university entrance exam a second time was as tense as it could possibly be, I failed it the first time so it had to be better this time around. On completing the papers within the designated time, I remember being really excited at the outcome - it went smoothly and I wrote cleverly, in fact, it seemed quite easy to me. So you can imagine my shock when two weeks later at a cyber cafe, I saw a score of 193 as against the minimum requirement of 200. I had fell short a second time and I was heart-broken - so much that I told myself I would never attend a university, it was that bad. I was so disappointed and lost focus, the pain was too much. Of course I lived through it, got into the university and studied the course I always wanted to.

First time i saw my mom cry, I don't even think I have seen her shed a tear since then - the woman's a robot. I was a kid actually, an uncle of hers' came visiting just like every other day he did; only this time, he brought devastating news of the passing of a family friend of hers'. It was not a good sight, but I understood pain and its psychological effect on us. It made my otherwise strong and fierce mom break-down.
No one is immune to it, it strikes us and we feel the weight of it. It comes in many forms and my illustrations above are mere representations on emotional responses in different situations. Pain never killed anyone, and I don't suppose it ever will so there's really no point letting others dictate our emotional state.
Learning to embrace circumstances is a proven method to overcoming the negative effect such may pose to incite in us. By accepting what we have little or no control over, we activate a fail-safe in us that instinctively provides a solution dependent upon how each individual is built.

Analogues Of Infection: The Nut And The Campanile

Infectious behaviors and attitudes abound all around us - sometimes they make a lasting impact on us, and sometimes they just infect us temporarily - nevertheless, it is a wise thing to avoid people who are bitter, unhappy, vindictive and sour. Emotional states are as infectious as diseases, they can sap and draw out many a good emotion and replace them with unhealthy feelings of resentment. I have heard someone say 'A man can die from the misery of another' - I do not know how true that may be but i can say for certain that the misery of one may often time rub off on another.

Many things are said to be infectious. Sleeping can be infectious, and yawning as well. In large-scale strategy, when the enemy is agitated and shows an inclination to rush, do not mind in the least. Make a show of complete calmness, and the enemy will be taken by this and will become relaxed. You infect their spirit. You can infect them with a carefree drunk-like spirit, with boredom or even weakness. (A BOOK OF FIVE RINGS, MIYAMOTO MUSASHI, SEVENTEENTH CENTURY)

There are so many around us who have been brought down by circumstances beyond their control, they deserve all the help and sympathy we can give them. But make no mistake, there are those who are not born to misfortune or unhappiness, but have drawn it upon themselves by their destructive actions and unsettling effect on others - it would be a great thing if we could help them, change their patterns or possibly even raise them up - but this may just be our undoing, we might just get caught up in the whirlwind of negativity circling above them. The reason for this is, humans are very susceptible to the moods, emotions, and thinking patterns of those with whom we spend our time.
Chronic dissatisfaction is one of the most insidious infections we come across. It is the building block by which all other negative emotions draw fuel. Bitterness, unhappiness, excessive thinking, sourness and vindictiveness are all signs of dissatisfaction. On the other hand, contentment is the one and only vaccination against dissatisfaction - contentment with ourselves, our community and generally our lives can go a long way to reducing, even eliminating, the infectious nature of discontent.
There will always be those who suffer from unhappiness and such, I do not say to run the other way whenever we meet them - we must however be careful when trying to better their situation - the first step being understanding the reason for their unhappiness, then working your way up from there. There is no need trying to change one whose heart and soul is discontent. Being able to recognize people on the effect they have on those around them is a sure way to know who is happy and who is not. Associating with those who draw happiness to themselves by their good cheer, natural buoyancy, and intelligence is not just a preference - it is a necessity.
If by nature you are miserly, or possibly just bitter through no fault of yours, it is necessary to associate with generous and lively souls. Doing this will draw their emotions to you, it opens up everything that is tight and restricted in you.
A gloomy individual must gravitate towards the cheerful.
An isolated individual must befriend the gregarious.
Never associate with those who share your defects - that just reinforces everything that holds you back from getting far in life. It is certain that we always come across those who do not appreciate our work, those who will not just understand our perspective - these people will try to bring you down by bad-mouthing you, some by indirectly poking hurtful jabs at you - after knowing all this, never give in to subtle or harsh critical opinions when you know your worth and yourself.

A famous Italian Renaissance polymath wrote this story:
THE NUT AND THE CAMPANILE
A nut found itself carried by a crow to the top of a tall campanile, and by falling into a crevice succeeded in escaping its dread fate. It then besought the wall to shelter it, by appealing to it by the grace of God, and praising its height, and the beauty and noble tone of its bells. "Alas," it went on, "as I have not been able to drop beneath the green branches of my old father and to lie in the fallow earth covered by his fallen leaves, do you, at least, not abandon me. When I found myself in the beak of the cruel crow, I made a vow that if I escaped, I would end my life in a little hole."
At these words, the wall, moved with compassion, was content to shelter the nut in the spot where it had fallen. Within a short time, the nut burst open: Its roots reached in between the crevices of the stones and began to push them apart; its shoots pressed up towards the sky. They soon rose above the building, and as the twisted roots grew thicker they began to thrust the walls apart and force the ancient stones from their old places. Then the wall, too late and in vain, bewailed the cause of its destruction, and in short time it fell to ruin. (LEONARDO DA VINCI, 1452-1519)

Such is the power of infection.

Society And Character

While a poor woman stood in the market place selling cheese, a cat came along and carried of a cheese. A dog saw the pilferer and tried to take the cheese away from him, but the cat stood up to the dog. They pitched into each other. Whilst the dog barked and snapped, the cat spat and scratched; but they could bring the battle to no decision.
"Let us go to the fox and have him referee the matter," the cat finally suggested. "Agreed," said the dog. So they went to the fox. The fox listened to their arguments with a judicious air. "Foolish animals," he chided them, "why carry on like that? If both of you are willing, I'll divide the cheese in two and you'll both be satisfied."
"Agreed," said the cat and the dog. So the fox took out his knife and cut the cheese in two, but, instead of cutting it lengthwise, he cut it in the width. "My half is smaller!" the dog protested. The fox looked judiciously through his spectacles at the dog's share. "You are right, quite right!" the fox decided. So he went and bit off a piece of the cat's share. "That should make it even," he said.
When the cat saw what the fox did she began to yowl: "Just look! My part is smaller now!" The fox again put on his spectacles and looked judiciously at the cat's share. "Right you are," said the fox. "Just a moment, and i will make it right." And he went and bit off a piece from the dog's cheese. This went on so long with the fox nibbling first at the dog's and then at the cat's share, then he finally ate up the whole cheese before their eyes. (A TREASURE OF JEWISH FOLKLORE, NATHAN AUSUBEL, ED., 1948)

There is a quote that goes like, "People always want what they cannot have." Well for the purpose of this post, I'm rephrasing it to be, "People will always want what they do not yet have."

There are a lot of interpretations and explanations regarding the word 'Envy', it would be time-consuming to get into each and every one of them. But the point being made in its entirety is virtually the same. It is a perfectly normal human emotion; though it is an emotion one might never hear another admit to very often. It is a strong emotion nonetheless; one that has divided kingdoms, started wars, and even torn relationships apart. Yes, envy has been and will always be, and i do not aim to banish it by writing this expose'. For those with an open mind willing to see the danger for what it is, pay close attention: ENVY IS THE WORST KIND OF EMOTION A PERSON CAN HAVE!
It is the mother of all negative emotions we as humans have come to see as normal. Hate, jealousy, anger, malice, corruption, aggression, and so on... all stem from a trunk of envy. It is the selfish need to be better than the next person that incites a lot of most if not all of the negative emotions we feel for others. Have i ever felt envious of another? Of course i have, else i would not be writing this.
Will the world automatically become a better place if we all choose to avoid emotions like these? No, I do not think so, but, it is a step in the right direction.

Plans And Consequence

THE TWO FROGS:
Two frogs dwelt in the same pool. The pool being dried up under the summer's heat, left it, and set out together to seek another home. As they went along they chanced to pass a deep well, amply supplied with water, and on seeing this one of the frogs said to the other: "Let us descend and make our abode in this well, it will furnish us with shelter and food." The other replied with greater caution: "But suppose the water should fail us, how can we get out again from so great a depth?"
(FABLES, AESOP, SIXTH CENTURY B.C).

Do nothing without a regard to the consequence. This might make you seem less ambitious, but it is better to be cautious than it is to be regretful of ones' actions.
The ending/ambition/goal/dream of any human is 'everything', for without any of these, one cannot but phase through life like leaves on a tree. Leaves have no sense of belonging. They are produced, they thrive, they remain green, they wither, and then they drop to the ground. That is all they do, it isn't rocket science. As humans, the ending is everything; plan all the way to it, taking into account all the possible consequences, obstacles, and twists of fortune that might reverse your hard work and give the glory to others.
Most men are ruled by the heart, not the head. Our plans are vague, and when we come across situations that prove unexpected, we improvise. Now the problem with improvisation is, it only gets us as far as the next crises. if you are not a theatre or motion picture actor, a performer and/or an entertainer, it is wise to leave improvisation techniques to those trained in it. Whilst improvising a solution can come in handy, it only postpones the crisis, it is never a substitute for thinking several steps ahead and planning to the end.

(There are very few men-and they are the exceptions-who are able to think and feel beyond the present moment, CARL VON CLAUSEWITZ, 1780-1831).

On the other hand, there are those people who are very good at setting goals for themselves, these group of people actually get what they started out for, but somewhere along the line they become so engrossed in winning, so much that coming off the attack becomes impossible. In other words, they become greedy. In reality though, aiming for a goal and keeping to it is very critical in the long run.
The person who goes too far in his triumphs creates a reaction that inevitably leads to a decline. Desires and aspirations are 'very different' from goals and dreams, most people believe that they are in fact aware of the future, that they are planning and thinking ahead. They are actually deluded: What they are actually doing is succumbing to their desires, to what they want the future to be. Plans like this are vague, based on imagination rather than reality. I myself have had to deal with desires that are really not mine per say, it is quite common with young people, although i have come across certain young people who are very focused on the task at hand because it yields their expectations in the future. There is no universal law governing the extent to which one can aspire, there is however a law that balances consequence and action.

Objectivity trumps subjectivity anytime, any day.
(He who asks fortune-tellers the future unwittingly forfeits an inner intimation of coming events that are a thousand times more exact than anything they may say, WALTER BENJAMIN, 1892-1940).

Appealing To The Vanity In Others

THE PEASANT AND THE APPLE-TREE
A peasant had in his garden an apple-tree, which bore no fruit, but only served as perch for the sparrows and grasshoppers. He resolved to cut it down,and, taking his ax in hand, made a bold stroke at its roots. The grasshoppers and sparrows entreated him not to cut down the tree that sheltered them, but to spare it, and they would sing to him and lighten his labors. He paid no attention to their request, but gave the tree a second and a third blow with his ax. When he reached the hollow of the tree, he found a hive full of honey. Having tasted the honeycomb, he threw down his ax, and, looking on the tree as sacred, took great care of it, (FABLES, AESOP, SIXTH CENTURY B.C).
If you need to get someone to do your bidding or perhaps do you a favour, it is wise that you appeal to his/her self-interest, for it is that alone which moves some men.

The truth about the world as we know it, is, there are very few people who genuinely and without need for reciprocation, give you what you ask. It is not an entirely negative trait, but it is a trait nonetheless. A lot of people at one time or the other may have come across a person whom they needed assistance from, but somewhere during that discussion, person A had to offer something in return to person B, so as to speed the decision process evidently going on in person B's head. Yes, we have all been there.
The trick in being successful at this though requires some kind of subtlety, you don't want to seem too manipulative, else you might end up getting the opposite of what you planned. Do not bother reminding him of your past assistance and good deeds, he/she will just find a way to ignore you. People naturally do not like being indebted to others, the reason for this mostly is because in such a situation, they feel like they don't have a choice. Instead of reminding said helper about what good deed you did before, uncover something in your request, something that will benefit him and emphasize it. Seven out of ten percent of the time, this strategy works.

(Most men are thoroughly subjective that nothing really interests them but themselves. They always think of their own case as soon as ever any remark is made, and their whole attention is engrossed and absorbed by the merest chance reference to anything which affects them personally, be it never so remote. ARTHUR SCHOPENHAUER, 1788-1860)

QUICK NOTE: A lot of people will deny they ever required something in return for the good deeds or assistance they rendered someone else. Well, don't expect otherwise. Nobody ever admits to serving their own personal interests.

The Art of Wisdom and Stupidity

Now, there is nothing of which a man is prouder than of intellectual ability, for it is this that gives him his commanding place in the animal world. It is an exceedingly rash thing to let anyone see that you are decidedly superior to him in this respect, and to let other people see it too...
Hence, while rank and riches may always reckon upon differential treatment in society; that is something that intellectual ability can never expect. To be ignored is the greatest favor shown to it, and if people notice it at all, it is because they regard it as a piece of impertinence, or else as something to which its possessor has no legitimate right and upon which he dares to pride himself. In retaliation and revenge for his conduct, people secretly try to humiliate him in some other way; and even if they hesitate to do this, it is only because they seek a fitting opportunity.
A man may be as humble as possible in his demeanor, and yet hardly ever get people to overlook his crime in standing intellectually above them. In the Garden of Roses, Sadi makes the remark: “You should know that foolish people are a hundredfold more averse to meeting the wise than the wise are indisposed for the company of the foolish.”
On the other hand, it is a real recommendation to be decidedly stupid at appropriate times. For just as warmth is agreeable to the body, so it does the mind good to feel its superiority; and a man will usually seek the company of someone likely to give him this feeling, as instinctively as he would approach a fireplace or walk in the sun to get warm. But this also means that he will be disliked on account of his superiority.
If a man out of the necessity in trying to further his cause to being liked, then he must act or seem inferior in point of intellect and never give off a highly intellectual charisma and/or demeanor, as this will only serve fatal to his motive.
(ARTHUR SCHOPENHAUER, 1788-1860)

Here’s a story a friend of mine told me recently, written in first-person perspective: There is this church I attend every Sunday, truth be told I am actually just a Sunday-Sunday Christian but that’s beside the point. Most of my fellow members have come to know me as that guy they saw only on Sundays and maybe on special occasions during the week, this is quite understandable because my parents attend the same church; in fact I was born into it, and with a congregation numbering just about a thousand, everyone seems to know everyone else at least on facial recognition basis. The point here is, seeing as I was a natural born member of this church, it is imperative that I be a more dedicated member, I personally do not share in that sentiment. Now, I know you (myself here as the writer) will be judging this situation but the thing is I really don’t get inspired anymore by the spiritual standing of the congregation... The resentment for me by some fellow members came to an all-time high when last Sunday, during a program, specific references were made publicly from the pulpit to me and my unending cycle of withdrawal from church activities. Someone even walked up to me after service and told me to my face that the reason for my lack of enthusiasm stems from my feeling of superiority among other members. I was dumbfounded, “Where did that idea come from?” I asked myself quietly. But what I now understood was that behaviour such as mine actually came off to others as superiority complex, which is totally not how I intended at all...
That story by my friend proves in fact that people will not like you for being different, and if they pretend they did, it would be because they were waiting for a time when they can say it to your face or probably humiliate and embarrass you, just to feed their ego. This happens to almost everyone, there’s no rule certifying who and who gets to be disliked for being intellectually superior; even just being different from a pack evokes the exact same emotion from other people in that same pack.
Given how important the idea of intelligence is to most people’s vanity, it is critical never inadvertently to insult or impugn a person’s brain power. To reveal the true nature of your intelligence rarely pays; you should get in the habit of downplaying it at ‘appropriate times’.

“Know how to make use of stupidity: The wisest man plays this card at times. There are occasions when the highest wisdom consists in appearing not to know, you must not be ignorant but you must be capable of playing it. It is not much good being wise among fools and sane among lunatics. He who poses as a fool is not a fool. The best way to be well received by all is to clothe yourself in the skin of the dumbest of brutes. (Baltasar Gracian, 1601-1658)”

Five Virtues Of The Cock

While serving under the duke Ai of Lu, T'ien Jao, resenting his obscure position, said to his master, "I am going to wander far away like a snow goose."
"What do you mean by that?" inquired the duke. "Do you see the cock?" said T'ien Jao in reply, its crest is a symbol of civility; its powerful talons suggest strength; its daring to fight any enemy denotes courage; its instinct to invite others whenever food is obtained shows benevolence; and last but not least, its punctuality in keeping the time through the night gives us an example of veracity. In spite, however, of these five virtues, the cock is daily killed to fill a dish on your table. Why? The reason is that it is found within our reach. On the other hand, the snow goose traverses in one flight a thousand. Resting in your garden, it preys on your fishes and turtles and pecks your millet. Though devoid of any of the cock's five virtues, yet you prize this bird for the sake of its scarcity. This being so, I shall fly far like a snow goose.
ANCIENT CHINESE PARABLES, YU HSIU SEN, ED.. 1974

MORAL:
Use absence to increase your value, respect and maybe even honor

The story of 'the five virtues of the cock' does not infer in totality that absence is a prerequisite for respect and/or value. In the case of a love affair, absence at the beginning of a relationship will do the exact opposite by causing yourself to be forgotten. At a point where an affair has developed to a certain extent of undiluted love and strong emotions, it is often wise to become scarce as this will not only make hearts grow fonder but also increases value and respect by evoking emotions of abandonment.
Once a person dies, everything about that person will seem different. He/she will be surrounded by an instant aura of respect. People will remember their criticisms of you, their arguments with you, and will be filled with regret and guilt. They start missing that presence that will never return. But you do not have to wait until death comes calling, make yourself scarce by deliberate absence and it's an added advantage if you have a certain talent or skill that will be missed while you're gone.

A man said to a dervish: "Why do i not see you often?" The Dervish replied, "Because the words 'Why have you not been seen by me?' are sweeter to my ear than the words 'Why have you come again?'" (Mulla Jami, quoted in Idries Shah's Caravan of Dreams, 1968)

Absence diminishes minor passions and inflames great ones, as the wind douses a candle and fans a fire (La Rochefoucauld, 1613-1680)

The Snake, The Farmer, And The Heron

A snake chased by hunters asked a farmer to save its life. to hide it from its pursuers, the farmer squatted and let the snake crawl into its belly. But when the danger had passed and the farmer asked the snake to come out, the snake refused. It was warm and safe inside. On his way home, the farmer saw a Heron and went up to him to whisper what had happened. The Heron told him to squat and strain to eject the snake. When the snake stuck its head out, the heron caught it, pulled it out and killed it. The farmer was worried that the snake's poison might still be inside him, and the heron told him that the cure for snake poison was to cook and eat six white fowl. "You're a white fowl," said the farmer. "You'll do for a start." He grabbed the heron, put it in a bag and carried it home where he hung it up while he told his wife what had happened. "I'm surprised at you." said the wife. "The bird does you a kindness, rids you of the evil in your belly, saves your life in fact, yet you catch it and talk of killing it." She immediately released the heron, and it flew away. But on its way, it gouged out her eyes.

MORAL: When you see water flowing uphill, it means that someone is repaying a kindness (Culled from African Folk Tales)

The story above does not prove to dis-credit the sanctity of trust but it is an eye opener though. The truth of the matter is, not everyone or everything should be trusted at first glance and/or action. In other words, never put too much trust in friends, learn how to use enemies also. They come in handy at times and truth be told, a old enemy is usually more trust-worthy than an old friend. The reason for this is, while an old friend can take you for granted because of the friendship you share, an old enemy who now has become a friend has a lot to prove to you.

As Baldassare Castiglione(1478-1529) wrote, "Thus for my own part i have more than once been deceived by the person i loved most and of whose love, above everyone else's, i have been most confident. So that i believe that it may be right to serve one person above all others, according to merit and worth, but never to trust so much in this tempting trap of friendship as to have cause to repent of it later on."